FAQ Log in
Search Profile
Memberlist Usergroups
Log in to check your private messages
Register
Jump To: Haelrahv Main Site | My Haelrahv Account | Haelrahv Play Page
Stupidity In The News
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 10, 11, 12, 13  Next
Post new topic   Reply to topic
The Official Haelrahv Message Forum Forum Index » Out of Character Discussions » Stupidity In The News
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
HR-Kelvin



Joined: 02 Sep 2006
Posts: 24

 Post Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 5:27 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

This may be fake, but if so, it's a great fake Smile

Quote:
NEW YORK - Idaho resident Kathy Evans brought humiliation to her friends and family Tuesday when she set a new standard for stupidity with her appearance on the popular TV show, "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire."

It seems that Evans, a 32-year-old wife and mother of two, got stuck on the first question, and proceeded to make what fans of the show are dubbing "the absolute worst use of lifelines ever."
After being introduced to the show's host Meredith Vieira, Evans assured her that she was ready to play, whereupon she was posed with an extremely easy $100 question. The question was:

"Which of the following is the largest?"
A) A Peanut
B) An Elephant
C) The Moon
D) Hey, who you calling large?

Immediately Mrs. Evans was struck with an all consuming panic as she realized that this was a question to which she did not readily know the answer.

"Hmm, oh boy, that's a toughie," said Evans, as Vieira did her level best to hide her disbelief and disgust. "I mean, I'm sure I've heard of some of these things before, but I have no idea how large they would be."

Evans made the decision to use the first of her three lifelines, the 50/50. Answers A and D were removed, leaving her to decide which was bigger, an elephant or the moon. However, faced with an incredibly easy question, Evans still remained unsure.

"Oh! It removed the two I was leaning towards!" exclaimed Evans. "Darn. I think I better phone a friend."

Using the second of her two lifelines on the first question, Mrs. Evans asked to be connected with her friend Betsy, who is an office assistant.

"Hi Betsy! How are you? This is Kathy! I'm on TV!" said Evans, wasting the first seven seconds of her call. "Ok, I got an important question. Which of the following is the largest? B, an elephant, or C, the moon. 15 seconds hun."

Betsy quickly replied that the answer was C, the moon. Evans proceeded to argue with her friend for the remaining ten seconds.

"Come on Betsy, are you sure?" said Evans. "How sure are you? Puh, that can't be it."

To everyone's astonishment, the moronic Evans declined to take her friend's advice and pick 'The Moon.'

"I just don't know if I can trust Betsy. She's not all that bright. So I think I'd like to ask the audience," said Evans.

Asked to vote on the correct answer, the audience returned 98% in favor of answer C, 'The Moon.' Having used up all her lifelines, Evans then made the dumbest choice of her life.

"Wow, seems like everybody is against what I'm thinking," said the too-stupid-to-live Evans. "But you know, sometimes you just got to go with your gut. So, let's see. For which is larger, an elephant or the moon, I'm going to have to go with B, an elephant. Final answer."
Evans sat before the dumbfounded audience, the only one waiting with bated breath, and was told that she was wrong, and that the answer was in fact, C, 'The Moon.'
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 6:40 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

HR-Kelvin wrote:
This may be fake, but if so, it's a great fake Smile


Otherwise I would weep for humanity
_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2007 11:51 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Quote:
Snorkeler mistaken for rodent, shot in face
POSTED: 10:48 p.m. EST, February 10, 2007

EUGENE, Oregon (AP) -- A snorkeler who was shot in the face after he was apparently mistaken for a swimming rodent was in good condition after surgery, a hospital said Saturday.

John William Cheesman, 44, of Springfield, underwent eight hours of surgery Thursday to remove bullet and bone fragments from his face, said his wife, Shelley Cheesman.

"He's doing really well," Shelley Cheesman said. "The bullet hit in front of his right ear, where the bone is the most dense. It just fragmented and didn't go into his brain."

He was listed in good condition at Oregon Health & Science University Hospital in Portland.

William Roderick, 60, of Reedsport, has been charged with assault, being a felon in possession of a firearm, and possession of methamphetamine and marijuana. He was being held in the county jail.

Roderick told deputies he thought Cheesman was a nutria swimming in the Smith River near Reedsport, about 90 miles southwest of Eugene, and shot him with a .22-caliber rifle, police said.

A nutria is a water-dwelling South American rodent species that is larger than a muskrat but smaller than a beaver. It was introduced to U.S. waters in the 1940s, according the National Wildlife Federation.

Cheesman, an avid diver, was in the river looking at different species of fish, his wife said. He swam to the river bank and yelled for help.

Roderick and another man came to Cheesman's aid in a boat, called 911 and drove him to an ambulance.

"I do give him credit for helping him," Shelley Cheesman said of Roderick.

_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
RLH



Joined: 15 Aug 2004
Posts: 170
Location: Llanfair Courthouse

 Post Posted: Mon Feb 12, 2007 12:46 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

A man name CHEESEMAN mistaken for a rodent ................................
_________________
S.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The real issue isnt whether or not there is a morally acceptable amount of sex or violence, the real issue is; how can we put more sex in our violence?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Xavain Gramorham says, "Yet you wanted to marry Mellie."
You hear the voice of Yaru Dex say, "For her MONEY geez! Not her VA****!."
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tao



Joined: 19 Nov 2002
Posts: 1733
Location: Maryland

 Post Posted: Mon Feb 12, 2007 1:45 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Heh...stranger things have happened.
_________________
Lick or Be Licked
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2007 10:34 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Quote:
BERLIN, March 9 (Reuters Life!) - A 43-year-old German decided to settle his imminent divorce by chainsawing a family home in two and making off with his half in a forklift truck.

Police in the eastern town of Sonneberg said on Friday the trained mason measured the single-storey summer house -- which was some 8 metres (26 feet) long and 6 metres wide -- before chainsawing through the wooden roof and walls.

"The man said he was just taking his due," said a police spokesman. "But I don't think his wife was too pleased."

After finishing the job, the man picked up his half with the forklift truck and drove to his brother's house where he has since been staying.

_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tao



Joined: 19 Nov 2002
Posts: 1733
Location: Maryland

 Post Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 10:24 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Code:
A Central Florida woman is accused of luring three young boys into a hot tub while naked and then having a sexual encounter while her husband, who is an Osceola County Fire Department battalion chief, watched, WKMG-TV in Orlando reported.

Investigators said Maryann Long, 44, allegedly lured the boys into her Illinois Avenue home in St. Cloud, Fla., with husband and fire chief William Long.

According to the arrest report, Maryann Long gave the 14- and 15-year-old boys Bailey's and vodka, then made a sexual advance while her husband looked on.
 
The mother of one of the boys contacted police.

Maryann Long was charged with three counts of lewd and lascivious battery, child abuse and contributing to the delinquency of a minor by serving the alcohol .

Long's husband was charged with child neglect for being present at the scene and not acting to prevent the crimes, police said.

Both were booked into the Osceola County Jail.

_________________
Lick or Be Licked
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tao



Joined: 19 Nov 2002
Posts: 1733
Location: Maryland

 Post Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 10:30 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Code:
A 19-year-old Chandler man has been arrested on accusations he cooked methamphetamine in a toaster, setting fire to his condo and prompting him to take unusual steps to try to put out the blaze, authorities said Thursday.

Jonathan Zaletel was unable to douse the fire with water when it broke out late Tuesday, and tried to put it out with window cleaner, Maricopa County sheriff’s spokesman Lt. Paul Chagolla said Thursday.

When that didn’t work, Zaletel then went to a local Wal-Mart store to purchase a fire extinguisher. By the time he got home, Chagolla said, firefighters and police were at his condo at 1287 N. Alma School Road, and sprinklers had doused the fire.

He was booked into jail on suspicion of manufacturing dangerous drugs, possession of chemicals and equipment to manufacture dangerous drugs, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and criminal damage.

_________________
Lick or Be Licked
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tao



Joined: 19 Nov 2002
Posts: 1733
Location: Maryland

 Post Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 10:45 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Code:
FOND DU LAC, Wis. — Rick Lisko hunts deer with a bow but got his most unusual one driving his truck down his mile-long driveway.
The young buck had nub antlers — and seven legs. Lisko said it also had both male and female reproductive organs.

"It was definitely a freak of nature," Lisko said. "I guess it's a real rarity."

He said he slowed down as the buck and two does ran across the driveway Nov. 22, but the buck ran under the truck and got hit.

When he looked at the animal, he noticed three- to four-inch appendages growing from the rear legs. Later, he found a smaller appendage growing from one of the front legs.

"It's a pretty weird deer," he said, describing the extra legs as resembling "crab pinchers."

"It kind of gives you the creeps when you look at it," he said, but he thought he saw the appendages moving, as if they were functional, before the deer was hit.

Warden Doug Bilgo of the state Department of Natural Resources came to Lisko's property near Mud Lake in the town of Osceola to tag the deer.

"I have never seen anything like that in all the years that I've been working as a game warden and being a hunter myself," Bilgo said. "It wasn't anything grotesque or ugly or anything. It was just unusual that it would have those little appendages growing out like that."

Bilgo took photos and sent information on the animal to DNR wildlife managers.

John Hoffman of Eden Meat Market skinned the deer for Lisko, who wasn't going to waste the venison from the animal.

"And by the way, I did eat it," Lisko said. "It was tasty."


_________________
Lick or Be Licked
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Wed Mar 14, 2007 8:43 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Quote:
Starbucks, the chain that puts within blocks of each other, plans to open 40,000 additional stores.

Starbucks Chief Executive Jim Donald tells Expansion, the Spanish financial newspaper, that his company is adding six shops and 350 employees a day.

"We will open at least 40,000 cafes (half of them outside the United States)," Donald says.

_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
HR-Trevor
Boss Type Guy


Joined: 04 Oct 2002
Posts: 6683
Location: Louisville, KY

 Post Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:19 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

And thus continued the steps toward that fateful day which would devour the planet in a torrential whirpool of black sludge and blood: The Coffee Wars.
_________________
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something." -- Plato

-- Trevor Rage / Rich Mondy
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
soundless
EIGHT YEARS OLD!!!


Joined: 22 May 2004
Posts: 5970
Location: Spaceship

 Post Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:29 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Beans will be the new Spice


_________________
A bright-eyed Thekko Ku Kalla dressed in a dapper sailor suit takes to flight and careers through the air toward the Modan Kucho and slams into him!
With a high-pitched cry, The Modan Kucho collapses in death.
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message
tygerwulf
Teh Pink Assassin.


Joined: 06 Jul 2003
Posts: 1189
Location: Hiding right behind you, Don't look!

 Post Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 12:10 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

I fucking hate starbucks and everything it stands for. I can't pass a starbucks without becoming completely enraged. My friends got me to actually go into one one time. I last like 2 minutes before I had to go outside, because I was fixing to hurl from the smell.
_________________
>ask librarian about books
An elderly librarian says, "I don't know much about that, I'm afraid."
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Fri Mar 16, 2007 5:15 pm    Post subject:
Reply with quote

tygerwulf wrote:
I last like 2 minutes before I had to go outside, because I was fixing to hurl from the smell.


Heh that's how I feel anytime I walk past a Cinnabon in a mall.
_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Tylen
Alpha Antifemale


Joined: 29 Jul 2003
Posts: 1192
Location: Not Colorado

 Post Posted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 12:33 am    Post subject:
Reply with quote

Quote:
March 16, 2007 (Computerworld) A New Jersey woman on trial for murdering her husband in April 2004 did a Google search on the phrase "how to commit murder," exactly 10 days before she allegedly shot him to death, according to a digital technology expert, who worked for the New Jersey State Police.

Melanie McGuire, 33, also did searches on Google and MSN for "undetectable poisons," "fatal digoxin levels," "instant poisons," "toxic insulin levels," "how to purchase guns illegally," how to find chloroform," "fatal insulin doses," "poisoning deaths," "where to purchase guns illegally," "gun laws in Pa.," "how to purchase guns in Pa.," and "where to purchase guns without a permit," according to court testimony from Jennifer Seymour, who now works for the U.S. Department of Defense.

_________________
** The phrase "break a leg" just wasn't ambitious enough for Mellie Knight. [8:31 pm]
** Mellie Knight was soundly defeated by Aesal Anari-Idia in the Zgedhi Gkenrzeg Rav! [8:31 pm]
 Back to top »
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Display posts from previous:   
The Official Haelrahv Message Forum Forum Index » Out of Character Discussions » Stupidity In The News
Post new topic   Reply to topic All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Goto page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... 10, 11, 12, 13  Next
Page 11 of 13

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Top Index




Solaris phpBB theme/template by Jakob Persson
Copyright © Jakob Persson 2003



Powered by phpBB 2.0.22 © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group